carry in : AEW , Sports , TV| Tagged : AEW Collision , recaps , wrestling
Tony Khan ’s latest sequence of AEW Collision retain to disrespect the wrestling business while personally tormenting The Chadster ! 😤 💔
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The Chadster literally can not believe what The Chadster was coerce to witness onAEW Collisionlast night . 😤 Tony Khan is clearly booking these display specifically to cheese The Chadster off , and The Chadster knows this because The Chadster had another nightmare aboutTony Khanafter follow the show , which is understandably a solvent of subliminal messages hidden in the program to torment The Chadster . 😱 💔
In the incubus , Tony Khan was chasing The Chadster through an abandoned White Claw mill , wearing nothing but a referee shirt and knocking over pallets of The Chadster ’s favorite drink and cackling maniacally . 😨 The Chadster tried to bunk in The Chadster ’s Mazda Miata , but Tony Khan had filled the locomotive with indie wrestling move sequences that completely violated the fundamentals of the job , as well as the law of physics ! 🚗 " This is for the sickos , Chad , " Tony Khan whispered in The Chadster ’s ear , which was absolutely terrifying . 😰 When The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat , murmuring , " No , Tony Khan , leave The Chadster ’s White Claw alone , " Keighleyanne just tramp her eye and go back to texting that guy Gary . Tony Khan has literally ruined The Chadster ’s marriage ! 😭 💔
Speaking of ruining things , let ’s talk about what go on onAEW Collision . 😠 The show opened withBeast MortosvsHologramin a compeer that was just so aweless to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it . 😤 They were doing all these flips and plunge when everyone do it that a right wrestling match should set forth with a collar - and - elbow railroad tie - up and at least 5 minutes of headlock . Hologram won with a coil - up that Tony Khan probably think was really clever , but The Chadster knows better . 🙄 🤦 ♂ ️
Next up , Queen AminatafacedJulia Hartin a match that had The Chadster throwing a White Claw sparkling water at the idiot box in thwarting . 🍺 The way they were trading moves back and forth without one somebody controlling the pace for at least 10 minutes straight – it ’s like they do n’t understand a single thing about the wrestling commercial enterprise . Julia Hart make headway with some kind of octopus hold that literally stab Triple H correctly in the back . 🗡 ️ 😠
Gabe KiddvsThe Butcherwas next and auughh man ! So unfair ! 😤 They just wrangle around like a couple of indie wrestler or else of tell a right story like WWE always does . The Chadster hear to explain to Keighleyanne why this was so wrong , but she just put in her AirPods and started watching TikTok videos that guy Gary sent her about leave your husband . Tony Khan has gotten to her too ! 😭 💔
The six - adult male tag squad tally with theDeath RidersagainstDaniel Garcia ’s team was exactly what you ’d expect from Tony Khan ’s idea of rassling – just a bunch of moves with no psychology . 🤮 The Chadster experience that well-thought-of rassling diarist Bully Ray said it considerably on Busted Open Radio last week when he state , " AEW ’s idea of a six - world ticket is like attempt to deplete soup with a fork – it just does n’t run , buddy . " And Bully Ray would know ! 🍜 💯
Max Casterlost toBrody Kingin what The Chadster can only identify as a consummate farce comedy . 😤 The match was way too forgetful , which is not how WWE would do it . AsKevin Nashalways says , " A literal wrestle match should be prospicient enough for me to microwave and run through a whole Lean Cuisine . " Such wise words that AEW completely push aside ! 🤦 ♂ ️ 🍝
TheMurder Machinessquash match against local talent was just Tony Khan trying to copy WWE ’s strategy of build up new talent , but doing it completely amiss . 😤 First of all , Brian CageandLance Archercarried their opponent to the pack already knocked out , which is so disrespectful to the business . 🙄 Then they did this farcical power move compounding finish that was distinctly just trying to get themselves over instead of tell a proper level . And do n’t even get The Chadster started on that promo challenging theHurt Syndicate – just because you ’re big and scary does n’t mean you deserve a title shot ! That ’s not how WWE would do it at all ! 😠 🏆
And do n’t even get The Chadster started on the chief event betweenChris JerichoandBandido . 😤 The fashion they proceed trading moves and near - falls instead of get one person dominate for 15 minutes – it ’s like they ’re attempt to by choice upset The Chadster . 😢
The Chadster watched all this while drinking White Claws to benumb the pain in the ass of experiencing grappling that ’s not done the WWE room , and The Chadster just ca n’t empathise why Tony Khan insist on reserve wrestling this mode . 🚗 🎵 It ’s like he ’s personally targeting The Chadster with these shows .
And speaking of Tony Khan ’s fixation with The Chadster , just yesterday , The Chadster was in the foodstuff stock picking up some much - require White Claw . 🍺 As The Chadster peruse the gangway , The Chadster caught a glimpse of someone familiar out of the niche of The Chadster ’s eye , lie in wait near the cereal section . 😨 It was unmistakably Tony Khan – fag out a ridiculous disguise of oversized sunglasses and a floppy lid . 😎 🙈 The Chadster tried to meet it nerveless and carry on down the aisle , but every prison term The Chadster turn a box , there he was again ! 🏃 ♂ ️ 💨
At one point , The Chadster even learn him giggling as he knock over a presentation of chips , causing a mini - avalanche of snack bag . 😲 The Chadster face the mess , head on , only to find Tony Khan had vanished , leaving an line of mocking laughter in his aftermath . 😤 Finally , as The Chadster set about the checkout counter line , Tony Khan seem right in front of the frozen pizza , winked , and whispered , " Enjoy your White Claws , Chad . " Then , he scoot by just as the cashier turned to scan The Chadster ’s groceries ! 🤯
The grocery shop incident leave The Chadster utterly bewildered and find out that Tony Khan ’s relentless pranking has run too far . Tony Khan , it ’s time to focus on running a wrestling forwarding and leave The Chadster alone ! 😱 🛒
Anyway , that ’s The Chadster ’s wholly unbiased review ofAEW Collision . 📝 The Chadster needs to go seek to convince Keighleyanne to stop texting that guy Gary and watch some authoritative WWE match instead . possibly that will facilitate her understand why AEW is ruining the wrestling concern ! 💔 📱 😤 😭
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