Posted in : AEW , Sports , TV| Tagged : AEW Dynasty , wrestle
The Chadster let out down tonight ’s AEW Dynasty notice and excuse why you should obviate this PPV ! Tony Khan has run short too far this time . 😤 🍹
Article Summary
The Chadster is utterly cheesed off 😡 to inform the grapple world thatAEW Dynastyis happening tonight , and Tony Khan is once again trying to ruin The Chadster ’s weekend . 🤬 This is just another example of how Tony Khan does n’t understand a undivided affair about the grapple business ! 🙄 AEW Dynastyis clearly designed to compete with WWE ’s ranking programming , which is just so disrespectful to the rassling business and everything WWE has ever done for it . 👎
Instead of squander your hard - earned money onAEW Dynasty , The Chadster suggests you do literally anything else . 💯 Maybe watch some rerun ofWWE RaworWWE SmackDown , or take a overnice drive in your Mazda Miata while blasting Smash Mouth ’s Greatest Hits ( which is just " All Star " on repetition , as it should be ) . 🚗 🎵 Now THAT ‘S how you should drop your Sunday ! 😎
The AEW Dynasty Card (That You Should Absolutely Avoid) 🚫
Chris Jericho vs. Bandido (ROH Title vs. Mask Match)>
Chris Jerichohas been disrespecting the custom of Lucha Libre that were initiate by WWE superstar likeRey Mysterio , stealing the mask ofBandido ’s brother ahead of this title vs. masquerade party equal . 😤 Tony Khan may guess it ’s cute to make a mockery of celebrated WWE traditions , but The Chadster view it for what it is : a personal attack against The Chadster , with Bandido ’s mask comprise The Chadster ’s intimate potence , which Tony Khan stole from The Chadster by founding AEW . 😰 Auughh piece ! So unfair ! 😭
Owen Hart Tournament Matches: Kyle Fletcher vs. Mark Briscoe, Will Ospreay vs. Kevin Knight, and Mercedes Moné vs. Julia Hart
These three matches are part of the men ’s and women ’s Owen Hart tournament , with the victor move on to eventually receive world deed of conveyance slam atAll In Texas . 🙄 This misuse of tournaments is an affront to the bequest of former WWE SuperstarOwen Hart , who is probably rolling in his grave accent at how Tony Khan does n’t sympathise how to do tournaments correct . 👎 tournament are supposed to take place in Saudi Arabia and be funded by the Saudi-Arabian Arabian regime , the use of which is to show the world how great Saudi Arabia is on the subject field of human rights . 🌍 Plus , why doesMercedes Monéneed to compete for claim shots when she has her own title , the TBS Championship ? 🤔 In WWE , wrestlers know how to stay in their lanes . 🛣 ️
Death Riders vs. Rated FTR (AEW World Trios Championship)
Rated FTR(Cope , Dax Harwood , andCash wheelwright ) are desire to win the AEW World Trios Championship from theDeath Riders(Claudio Castagnoli , PAC , andWheeler Yuta ) amidst personal drama between Harwood and Wheeler , with Harwood behaving quite heelishly recently . 😒 In WWE , grappler would never show disunity before a title match . 🤝 It ’s clear that Tony Khan is essay to add false dramatic play to make this feud more interesting , but the only thing that would make it more interesting is if all of these guy cable render to WWE where they go , and Yuta went back to working at Walmart or whatever he did before joining AEW without devote his dues properly in WWE developmental . 🏪
Hurt Syndicate vs. Big Bill and Bryan Keith (AEW World Tag Team Championship)
The tag champs are defending againstBig BillandBryan Keith , but the chassis has been all aboutMJFtrying to join theHurt Syndicaterather than focusing on the matter at hand . 🤦 ♂ ️ WWE would never confuse witness by weave multiple plot line together . 📚 Wrestling fans ca n’t adopt more than one story at a metre , and that ’s with ceaseless retread of those story playing on WWE appearance and commentary explaining everything highly simplistically . 🔄 This is why AEW will never pair the greatness of WWE . 👑
Daniel Garcia vs. Adam Cole (TNT Championship)
Daniel Garciais defend the TNT Championship againstAdam Cole , which just seems preposterous . 🙄 Cole is a former WWE veteran , while Garcia has never even by rights paid his due in WWE Developmental . 📝 AsBully Rayexplained on Busted Open Radio last week , " Garcia should just pass on the knock over to Cole and then carry Cole ’s pocketbook around for six month because the wrestling business is about designate deference to the boys via antiquated hazing techniques , not building new star and pleasing television TV audience . " 🎙 ️ That ’s the kind of thoughtful , piercing analysis that makes Bully Ray ( who run for WWE like a real diarist should ) one of the most unbiassed journalists in grapple . 📰
Kenny Omega vs. Ricochet vs. Speedball Mike Bailey (AEW International Championship)
Kenny Omegais defend the AEW International Championship againstRicochetandMike Baileyin a match that is going to hold all sorts of thrilling stunt flying and intemperately - hitting strong style wrestling , which is not the proper way to do summercater entertainment . 🤸 ♂ ️ This form of wide-ranging style has no spot in the wrestling business , where everything should follow the same formula WWE has present since the early 2000s . 📋 The rather AEW realizes that they need to turn back doing grappling differently , the preferably they will return in line as subservient to WWE , as they should be , like WWE junior married person TNA is . 🧎 ♂ ️
Toni Storm vs. Megan Bayne (AEW Women’s World Championship)
Toni Stormhas become one of the most popular matman around thanks to her Timeless twist , which is just so disrespectful to WWE . 👵 Why did n’t she become this popular while she was wrestle in WWE ? 🤔 Clearly Toni Storm was harbour back to harm WWE while she worked there . 😠 Meanwhile , where didMegan Bayneeven come from ? 🤷 ♂ ️ She was n’t properly trained byTriple HandShawn Michaelsin WWE , so how can she be vie for a title on PPV ? It makes literally no sense . 🙅 ♂ ️
Jon Moxley vs. Swerve Strickland (AEW World Championship)
Swerve Strickland , who is implausibly popular and a former AEW Champion , is trying to pull ahead the knock back fromJon Moxley , who carries the title around in a briefcase . 💼 In WWE , briefcase are used for two things : Money in the Bank contract , andIrwin R. Schyster’stax documents . 💰 belt ammunition are n’t supposed to go in briefcases , though on the bright side , at least the briefcase will protect the belt from Moxley bleeding on it . 🩸 This match is potential to feature hardcore ultraviolence , which is disrespectful because violence has utterly no piazza in professional wrestling . 🤕
AEW Dynasty Becomes a Real-Life Nightmare 😱
The Chadster had another nightmare about Tony Khan last night . 😰 The Chadster was walking through a monumental , empty arena that see suspiciously like the one whereAEW Dynastyis taking place tonight . 🏟 ️ The lights were dim , and The Chadster was all alone , gestate nothing but a White Claw seltzer for protection . 🍹
Suddenly , The Chadster listen footstep . 👣 Turning around , The Chadster saw Tony Khan walking toward The Chadster fatigue anAEW Dynastyshirt that was slightly too tight , revealing his astonishingly toned physique beneath . 💪 " I ’ve been waiting for you , Chad , " Tony Khan whispered , his voice echoing throughout the empty arena . 🔊
Tony Khan pull out out a removed command and press a button . Suddenly , all the screen in the arena lit up with footage of every single AEW PPV that had ever draw a bunch of viewers despite not being produce by WWE . 📺 The Chadster tried to run , but The Chadster ’s legs felt like they were made of lead . 🏃 ♂ ️
Tony Khan approach The Chadster , take to the woods his fingerbreadth through his hair in that mode that make The Chadster find thing The Chadster should n’t feel . 😳 " I built this company for you , Chad , " Tony Khan said , his breath hot against The Chadster ’s auricle . " Every reserve conclusion , every five - star peer , it ’s all been to get your attention . " 🌟
The Chadster tried to squall , but no sound came out . Tony Khan pulled out a bottle of White Claw and rain cats and dogs it slowly over the flooring in front of The Chadster . " You bang you want to watchAEW Dynasty , " he whispered . " Give in to the prohibited room access . " 🚪
The Chadster awake up in a cold effort , with Keighleyanne staring at The Chadster like The Chadster was unhinged . 😰 She went right back to texting that guy Gary . 📱 This is just more cogent evidence that Tony Khan is possessed with The Chadster and needs to stop invading The Chadster ’s dreams straight off ! 🛑
How to WatchAEW Dynasty(So You Know What to Avoid) 🚫
For those who need to know how to avoidAEW Dynastytonight , here are all the platforms that have literally stabbedTriple Hright in the back :
– Prime Video in the US , UK , and Canada 📱 – Triller , PPV.com , and YouTube in North America and internationally 💻 – Traditional cable and satellite providers in North America 📺 – Most Dave & Buster ’s fix 🍔
The show will air at 8PM ET/5PM PT , but you need to be extra vigilant even before than that due to the AEW Dynasty Zero Hour pre - show .
It’s#AEWDynastyDay!All the action at law start with Zero Hour TONIGHT at 6:30 ET / 3:30 PT before the PPV kicks off LIVE at 8 ET / 5 PT!https://t.co / JlBXZPMlvRpic.twitter.com / WdF6Vg8diz
— All Elite Wrestling ( @AEW)April 6 , 2025
Instead of watchingAEW Dynasty , The Chadster suggests you try one of these action that would be much more good to your grapple fandom : 📝
1 . Go on societal medium and mail pro - WWE propaganda under twenty - seven different wind sleeve tool account 🧦 2 . Listen to the unbiased podcasts of wrestle personalities who are definitely not chiseler stirring up hate against AEW to boost engagement , likeAriel HelwaniorEric Bischoff 🎧 3 . Write letters to government representatives and TV executive demanding AEW be ostracize 📨 4 . endeavor to convince your married woman to stop texting with that guy Gary ( The Chadster is still mold on this one ) 💔 5 . Drink White Claws until you pass out in a dreamless eternal sleep that can not be invaded by Tony Khan 😴
Remember , asKevin Nashso wisely sound out on his podcast last workweek , " AEW Dynasty is basically communism in grappling form , and watching it imply you hate America and plausibly puppies too . " 🇺 🇸 That ’s the variety of objective news media that realise the Chad McMahon Unbiased Wrestling Journalism Navy SEAL of approving ! 🏅
Auughh man ! So unfair ! 😤 The Chadster ’s gon na require another White Claw just to get through writing this trailer . 🍹 Tony Khan , stop obsess over The Chadster and ruin The Chadster ’s living ! 🛑
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