Posted in : AEW , Sports , TV| Tagged : AEW Revolution , worm
The Chadster reluctantly previews AEW Revolution , a PPV that ’s literally knife WWE in the back ! Tony Khan is really cheesing The Chadster off ! 🤮 💔 🏆
Article Summary
The Chadster is here with the most objective , unbiased preview ofAEW Revolutionthat you ’ll retrieve anywhere on the internet ! 😤 💯 🏆 As one of the only in truth unbiased diary keeper in professional wrestle today , The Chadster feel it ’s his professional duty to coverAEW Revolutiontonight , even though just think about it makes The Chadster ’s stomach churn violently . 🤢 🤮 ( Though The Chadster must admit that the eight White Claws consumed before 10AM might be contributing factors as well ) . 🍹 🍹 🍹
But The Chadster ’s consignment to nonsubjective wrestle news media means sometimes making sacrifices , like subjecting himself to several hours of Tony Khan ’s blatant discourtesy toward the wrestling business . 😡 The things The Chadster does for you readers ! 📝 💪
AEW Revolution Full Match Card Preview
cut Strickland facesRicochetwith a World Championship match on the wrinkle for the winner . to boot , Stricklandwants to regain the robe of his manager , Prince Nana , that was stolen by Ricochet . Only in AEW would competitors feud over a bathrobe . 🧖 ♂ ️ In WWE , they have real reason for feud , like when someone disgorge a cup of umber on Knoxville mayorGlenn Jacobs . ☕ That ’s storytelling ! 📚 🎭
MJFwill faceHangman Adam Pagein some sort of score lucifer that has the AEW fans all hyped up . 🙄 But does this equal even have anything of the calibre ofJohn Cenaturning bounder againstCody Rhodes , like they ’re doing in WWE ? 🤔 Tony Khan might as well just give up trying to craft his laughable idea of plot line . 😂 WWE will always be better because they understand that wrestle should be Sports Entertainment . 🎪 🎡
Will Ospreaywill faceKyle Fletcherin a steel cage match , just one calendar week after WWE’sElimination ChamberPPV . 🤨 Do n’t think that The Chadster ca n’t see what Tony Khan is trying to do here , pretend out like AEW can put on matches that take place inside John Cage too . 🔒 Tony Khan needs to lead off coming up with his own idea . 💡 But also , Tony Khan needs to follow the formula that WWE hone and not deviate from it one tiny bit . 📏 📐
AEW Continental ChampionKazuchika Okadawill defend his claim againstBrody King , who disrespected the business when he decided to continue his faction afterMalakai Blackleft AEW to presumably repay to WWE , as if a WWE Superstar is somehow not even important enough to warrant break a camarilla up . 😠 The Chadster is just so cheese off about this clamorous disrespect . Auughh man ! So unjust ! 😫
AEW World Tag Team ChampionsThe Hurt Syndicate(Bobby LashleyandShelton Benjamin ) will defend their statute title againstThe Outrunners(Turbo FloydandTruth Magnum ) . The 80s gismo of The Outrunners is just so disrespectful . 📼 🕹 ️ WWE buy up the tape measure library of all of those defunct eighties promotions , which means they own the stylemark on 80s wrestling . 📜 The Chadster reckon it ’s very large ofTriple Hto not action AEW over this gimmick . 🙏
Mercedes Monéwill defend her TBS Championship against Stardom wrestlerMomo Watanabe , as Tony Khan continues to recognise that wrestling exists around the world , 🌎 unlike WWE ’s cautiously curated image that WWE and the subservient TNA are the only subsist wrestling organizations , which The Chadster feels is a much fairer and unbiased standpoint . 📊 🧐
AEW International ChampionKonosuke Takeshitawill defend his title againstKenny Omegain a equal that is sure to be full of fast - paced military action and technical maneuvers , proving Tony Khan does n’t understand the first thing about what wrestling sports fan require . 🤦 ♂ ️ Wrestling devotee require methodical , carefully choreographed action that follows the same unproblematic format every time . 🔄 This is only go to confuse rooter and probably provide them feeling a small ghastly , just like The Chadster after he drink three too many White Claw seltzer while essay to rub out the storage of AEW from his mind . 🥴
AEW Women ’s World ChampionToni Stormwill defend her title againstMariah Mayas this feud continues to drag on forever and a day . ⏰ Tony Khan call for to understand that true grapple fans have unretentive computer storage and ca n’t follow a storyline as long and complex as the one between tempest and May . 📚 If Tony Khan ever want to amount anywhere close to the horizontal surface of WWE ( which he should not because that would be extremely disrespectful ) , he needs to recognize that fans want " moments , " not engaging long - full term fib with lots of twists and turns . ✨
The Rated R SuperstarEdgewill challenge AEW World ChampionJon Moxleyin the primary event , and it makes The Chadster perfectly sick to his belly ( or peradventure that has to do with the fifteen White Claws The Chadster drank so far while publish this trailer ) . 🍺 Two former WWE Superstars master eventing an AEW PPV ? 😱 The Chadster bet Triple H is believably cry decent now , so smart by the betrayal of these wrestler who WWE give everything to ( until WWE decided they were n’t needed any longer , which should have been their signal to withdraw gracefully and expect a WWE Hall of Fame invitation , not go wrestle for the challenger ) . 🏆 Whoever make headway this compeer , it will be the professional rassling business enterprise that suffer , as well as The Chadster ’s television , which will believably be soaked in White Claw by the time it ’s finished . 📺 💦
AsKevin Nashso eloquently said on his podcast last week , " AEW has all these matches with too many moves and not enough storytelling . They should learn from WWE where every punch has meaning and every Irish party whip tells a tale . " 🎭 The Chadster could n’t agree more with this objective , unbiassed judgement that has earned Nash the Chad McMahon Unbiased Wrestling Journalism seal of approval . 🏅
Tony Khan Invades The Chadster’s Dreams the Night Before AEW Revolution
The Chadster must share the horrifying nightmare The Chadster experienced last Nox . 😨 The Chadster was peacefully log Z’s after drinking only eleven White Claws , when of a sudden , The Chadster found himself inside the Crypto.com arena , whereAEW Revolutionwill take place . 🏟 ️
The arena was empty and drape in darkness , with just a unmarried spotlight illuminating the band . 💡 The Chadster cautiously come on , only to hear Tony Khan ’s laughter echo through the speakers . " I ’ve been expect for you , Chad , " he whispered , his voice somehow coming from everywhere at once . 👂
Tony Khan emerged from beneath the ring wearing nothing butPrince Nana’sstolen robe , the slick fabric glistening in the spotlight as it clung to his billionaire figure . 👔 💰 " I booked this entire PPV for the sickos , just to bedevil you , " Tony aver , slowly circling The Chadster like a predator . 🐆
The annulus ropes abruptly transformed into White Claw cans that began spray soda water everywhere , soaking The Chadster ’s favored Smash Mouth tetraiodothyronine - shirt until it cling uncomfortably to The Chadster ’s body . 💦 👕 The Chadster tried to escape , but the floor around the ring had become a steel batting cage , withWill OspreayandKyle Fletcherguarding the door , their muscular arm folded across their chests . 💪
" You ’ll catch every match tonight , " Tony Khan whispered , now inexplicably behind The Chadster , his intimation spicy on The Chadster ’s cervix . " And you ’ll find every flip , every superkick , every mo of long - terminal figure storytelling deeply in your very soulfulness . " 💔
Tony Khan then produced a reproduction of the AEW World Championship but with The Chadster ’s facial expression on the nameplate . " This belongs to me now , " he say , dangling it just out of The Chadster ’s orbit . 🏆 The Chadster lunged for it , but Tony pull back , make The Chadster to fall forrard into his arms in a mode that was totally not intimate at all and in spades just scary . 😱
The Chadster awaken up in a dusty sweat , with Keighleyanne sighing and moving to the far side of the bed , going back to texting that guy rope Gary . 📱 This is literally Tony Khan invade The Chadster ’s dreaming AND ruining The Chadster ’s marriage ! When will Tony Khan stop being so ghost with The Chadster ? 😫
How to Make Sure You Don’t Accidentally Watch AEW Revolution and Betray WWE
If you want to stave off disesteem the wrestling business and literally stabbing WWE right in the back , you need to steer altogether vindicated of Triller TV , PPV.com , YouTube , Prime Video ( North America and UK only ) , and traditional PPV supplier ( North America only ) , starting at 8PM ET/5PM PT tonight . 🚫 📺
Additionally , they should under no circumstance go anywhere virtually select Dave and Busters locations , as they will be showingAEW Revolutionthere as well . 🎮 🍔 The Chadster is admonish you because The Chadster cares about your wrestling soul ! 😇
Also avoid X , YouTube , and Facebook at 6:30PM ET/3:30PM PT as that ’s when theAEW Revolution Zero Hourpre - show will start . 🕡 The Chadster suggests that instead , you do something more restful and respectful to the wrestling business , like taking a cruise in your Mazda Miata while shoot some Graeco-Roman Smash Mouth . 🚗 🎵 Just yesterday , The Chadster was tug The Chadster ’s Miata with the top down , singing " All Star " at the top of The Chadster ’s lungs , when The Chadster think he picture Tony Khan recording him from a bush . 🌳 When The Chadster pulled over to confront him , he was kick the bucket – but The Chadster ’s pet Smash Mouth CD was enigmatically scrub when he obtain back in the car ! 💿 Auughh valet de chambre ! So unfair ! 😭 Good matter The Chadster has stacks of copy .
The Bottom Line ‘Cause Chad Said So
In last , AEW Revolutionis just go to be another model of how Tony Khan does n’t infer a exclusive thing about the wrestling business . 🤦 ♂ ️ It ’s just so disrespectful to the wrestling patronage and everything WWE has ever done for it . 👎 The Chadster will be watching tonight , but only as a professional certificate of indebtedness to provide the objective coverage that only The Chadster can have ! 📝 🏆
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