place in : Sports , boob tube , WWE| Tagged : wrestling , WWE LFG , WWE Rivals , WWE ’s Greatest Moments
El Presidente report from his presidential wrestling ring on A&E ’s volatile unexampled WWE lineup , have WWE LFG , WWE Rivals , and WWE ’s Greatest Moments ! CIA agents mind !
Article Summary
¡ Saludos , comrades ! It is I , your El Presidente , account to you live from my solid gold wrestling ring inside my presidential palace , where I am currently avoiding yet another CIA assassination try disguised as a cable television boob tube installation ! But not even the American imperialists can stop me from bringing you this exciting news about A&E ’s upcoming WWE computer programming beginning Sunday , February 16th , admit the debut of the new WWE LFG ! OMG !
As someone who once had the pleasure of watching wrestling matches with my dear friendFidel Castro(he was always fond toRazor Ramon , for obvious reason ) , I can recite you that February 16th will be a solar day that equal the greatest socialistic revolutions in history ! A&E is airing not one , not two , but THREE shows that will make you forget all about your bourgeois concerns !
First up at 8PM ET / PT is the brand new WWE LFG – and no , comrades , that does not stand up for " Let ’s Free Guantanamo , " though that would be an excellent suggestion ! This competition show will feature 16 brave someone compete for a slur in NXT , much like how I had to compete against 16 other candidates in my totally legitimate democratic election ( I pull ahead with 127 % of the vote ! ) . The contestant will be trained by legendary figures includingThe Undertaker , who reminds me of the metre I had to play utter to avoid a CIA operative at the 1996Royal Rumble .
Speaking of The Undertaker , my old drinking companionBooker Twill also be among the trainers , along withMickie JamesandBubba Ray Dudley . TripleH andShawn Michaelswill be supervise the competition – did you do it that The Game once visited my presidential compound ? Of course , he arrogate it never happened , but that ’s just because the CIA was watch !
At 9:30PM ET / PT , WWE Rivals fall with that capitalist comedy sensationGabriel " Fluffy " Iglesiasleading discussions about the greatest feuds in worm chronicle . This prompt me of the timeKim Jong - unand I quell up all nighttime debating whetherHulk Hoganvs . Ultimate Warriorwas better thanRockvs . Stone Cold . ( He still wo n’t take that Rock vs. Stone Cold was superscript , but what can you ask from someone who thinks his Father of the Church invented professional wrestling ? )
The show will boast commentary fromCody Rhodes , Kevin Nash , and many others discussing legendary rivalries likeCharlotte Flairvs . Becky Lynch – a feud that remind me of my own on-going battle with the American State Department , except with fewer death chair shots .
lastly , at 10:30PM ET / PT , another fresh one , WWE ’s Greatest Moments , debuts withMichael Colehosting . This programme will bet down the most memorable moments in WWE history , which I ’m sure will include my favorite instant when I almost convincedVince McMahonto create a " People ’s Republic " championship belt ( The CIA intercept my calls before we could settle the softwood ) .
Comrades , as someone who once had to find out Monday Night Raw via artificial satellite while hiding in a submarine off the seacoast of Miami , I can not verbalise how exciting this programming lineup sincerely is ! The only thing that could make it better would be if they included footage of the clock time I performed a perfect moonsault during the failed CIA coup attempt of 2013 – but alas , the footage mysteriously disappeared during a everyday raid of the CNN offices .
Remember , comrades : Wrestling , like socialist economy , is best enjoyed collectively ! So pucker your fellow revolutionist around your land - approved idiot box set on February 16th for thishistoric night of computer programming ! And if your cablegram survive out , fault the CIA – I always do !
¡ Viva la lucha libre ! This has been your El Presidente , report while practice my elbow joint drop on a spirit - sized composition board cutout of a CIA agent . Until next time , comrades !
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