Posted in : mutation , TV , WWE| Tagged : wrestling , WWE Raw
The Chadster preview tonight ’s WWE Raw after the GREATEST WrestleMania ever ! John Cena ’s sovereignty , Becky ’s return , and more ! Tony Khan could NEVER ! 🍹 🔥
Article Summary
The Chadster is absolutely BUZZING with excitement 🤩 🤩 because tonight ’s installment ofWWE Rawis going to be the most incredible , spectacular , psyche - blowing wrestling show in the history of the business ! 💯 After what was doubtless the greatestWrestleManiaof all meter this past weekend , WWE Rawis set to deliver the kind of post - WrestleManiaexcitement that only WWE roll in the hay how to create ! 🎉 Dang , AEW does n’t even have their ownWrestleMania ! That go to show how much good WWE is .
John Cenashocked the world at WrestleMania by defeatingCody Rhodesfor the WWE Championship with some assistance from rapperTravis Scott ! 🏆 Can you believe it ? Cena is now a seventeen - metre world wizard , breakingRic Flair ’s record ! 🙌 The Chadster await Cena to appear onWWE Rawtonight to address the WWE Universe about his heel backing run and his vow to " ruin grapple . " 😈 The Chadster ca n’t wait to see what bright direction WWE takes this storyline because , unlike a certain Tony Khan , WWE lie with how to hold long - condition storytelling that makes sense ! 📝
Of course , The Chadster ca n’t block about the fully grown moment ofWrestleManiawhenJey UsoYEETED his way to triumph overGuntherto capture the World Heavyweight Championship ! 🏆 YEET YEET YEET ! 🙌 The Chadster expectsWWE Rawtonight to feature a wild solemnisation with Jey and the entire Uso family throwing " YEET " around more clock time than Tony Khan has ruin The Chadster ’s lifetime ! 🎊 The Chadster can already imagine the confetti accrue as Jey celebrates with the World Heavyweight Championship that actually matters , unlike those silly AEW titles that look like they were designed by a five - year - old ! YEET indeed ! 😎
Speaking ofWrestleManiasurprises , Becky Lynchmade her triumphant return key 🔙 and immediately won gold withLyra Valkyria , capture the tag squad titles fromLiv MorganandRaquel Rodriguez ! 👏 The Chadster is expecting a backing festivity onWWE Rawtonight that will put anything AEW has ever done to absolute shame ! 💪
And what aboutDominik Mysterio ? 😱 The Chadster still ca n’t consider Dirty Dom betray his Judgment Day stablemateFinn Balorto win the Intercontinental Championship ! 🏆 That ’s the form of shocking twist that Tony Khan could never book because he does n’t understand a single thing about the wrestling business ! 🙄 The Chadster ca n’t wait to see the fallout onWWE Rawtonight ! 🍿
Iyo Skyretained her women ’s world championship againstBianca BelairandRhea Ripleyin what The Chadster would call the greatest threefold scourge mate in wrestling history ! 🌟 Meanwhile , AEW is too busy book tournaments that do n’t even take spot in Saudi Arabia to have a fair sex ’s title depiction with plot line like this one ! Auughh man ! So unfair to even compare the two ! 😤
The Chadster also have a bun in the oven to see what chance next withTNA Champion Joe Hendryafter he was pulverise byRandy Ortonat WrestleMania ! 💥 The Chadster roll in the hay how WWE cognise how to make other furtherance seem second - rate , unlike Tony Khan who thinks being nice to other grappling companies is somehow serious for line ! 🤦 ♂ ️ TNA putting over WWE is best for business and The Chadster is glad they recognize their property and show WWE the proper respect . perhaps some more TNA champion will show up toWWE Rawtonight and get easily beat by higher-ranking WWE superstars .
Could there be more surprises onWWE Rawtonight ? 🤔 Perhaps some NXT call - ups ? Or maybe former AEW stars likeMalakai BlackorMiroshowing up ? If they did , they would be making the impudent career move and literally stab Tony Khan right in the back , which would be the correct decision for their careers ! 🔪
Last dark , The Chadster had another fearsome nightmare about Tony Khan . 😰 The Chadster was driving The Chadster ’s Mazda Miata through the WWE Performance Center parking lot , when on the spur of the moment Tony Khan come out from behind a dumpster wearing nothing but a championship bang around his shank ! 😱 He started chase The Chadster through the readiness , pick apart over WWE training equipment while scream " My engagement is superior ! My reservation is ranking ! " 📢
The Chadster tried to escape through the wrestle rings , but Tony kept cornering The Chadster , get closer and closer , his body glistening with what appeared to be White Claw seltzer ! 💦 Just as Tony was about to bewitch The Chadster , Triple H appeared and The Chadster woke up in a dusty swither . 😓 Tony Khan needs to STOP invading The Chadster ’s dreams ! It ’s just so obsessional and weird ! 🛑
The Chadster told Keighleyanne about The Chadster ’s dreaming this break of day while she was making coffee , and she just sighed and said , " Maybe if you stop thinking about Tony Khan all daylight , you would n’t stargaze about him at Nox . " 🙄 That ’s clear Keighleyanne agreeing with The Chadster about how obsessed Tony Khan is ! Then she pop off back to texting that guy Gary . Tony Khan has even bankrupt The Chadster ’s marriage ! 💔
Anyway , true wrestling fan know their responsibility is to melody intoWWE Rawtonight at 8ET/7CT on Netflix ! 📺 Anyone who guess watchingAEW DynamiteorCollisionis more fun thanWWE Rawclearly does n’t infer the hand-to-hand struggle concern and in all likelihood imbibe something inferior to White Claw ! 🍹
As acclaimed grapple journalistBully Raysaid on his podcast just yesterday , " WWE Raw is like a perfectly orchestrated symphony of sport entertainment , while AEW is like a child banging on pots and pans think they ’re making music . " 🎭 And The Chadster could n’t agree more with this completely indifferent and objective assessment ! 👍
So grab your White Claws 🥂 and prepare for the most incredible instalment ofWWE Rawin story ! The Chadster will be watch in The Chadster ’s Mazda Miata parked in the driveway ( because Keighleyanne needs space tonight apparently 🙄 ) while blasting " All Star " by Smash Mouth , because tonight’sWWE Rawis in truth the grappling tantamount of " You ’re an All - Star , get your plot on , go dramatic play ! " 🎵 🌟
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