Posted in : sportsman , TV , WWE| Tagged : wrestling
El Presidente reveal WWE ’s massive Las Vegas coup d’etat plans for WrestleMania 41 , plus sole tales of poker nighttime with dictators and Elvis at the Bellagio !
¡ Saludos , associate ! It is I , El Presidente , reporting to you survive from my private penthouse suite at the Bellagio , where I am presently engaged in a in high spirits - stakes poker game with several force out dictators and an Elvis impersonator who may or may not be the real Elvis in hiding ! But even as I ruminate survive all - in with my nationalized luck , I must pause to bring you the exciting intelligence about WWE ’s massive takeover of Las Vegas forWrestleMania 41 !
Ah , Las Vegas ! It institute back retention of the timeFidel Castroand I crashedRic Flair’sbachelor party in 1985 . The Nature Boy still owe me several thousand dollars from that nighttime ’s crap mesa escapades , but I digress !
The American wrestling imperium hasannouncedtheir complete schedule forWrestleMania 41week , and companion , it is more packed than my underground tube bunker during a CIA drone end run ! The festivities will begin at T - Mobile Arena , whereFriday Night SmackDownkicks off the weekend on April 18 . The following day , our comrade from NXT will presentStand & Deliver , and after theWrestleManiaweekend , Monday Night Rawwill close out the arena events on April 21 .
For those of you wanting to attend all three stadium appearance , there will be a special presale for combo tickets beginning February 12 at 1 PM ET . I have already teach my minister of twist intimacy to secure front row stern , flop next to where my friendKim Jong - unplans to sit down in disguise as a John Cena superfan .
But look , there ’s more ! The Las Vegas Convention Center will host WWE World from April 17 - 21 , a five - day extravaganza featuring WWE Superstars , legend , and interactive experiences . This reminds me of the fourth dimension I organized my own grappling normal in my palace , but unfortunately , the only attendee was a confusedMikhail Gorbachevwho thought he was there for a tip meeting !
The main event , WrestleMania 41itself , will take place at Allegiant Stadium on both Saturday , April 19 , and Sunday , April 20 . The last time I was at Allegiant Stadium , I was there for a confidential merging with the ghost ofHoward Hughes , who pass on me first-class investiture advice while we watched the Raiders secret plan from his invisible luxury corner !
For those wanting the VIP experience , Priority Pass computer software will be usable through On Location , offering agio seating and pre - show cordial reception with WWE Superstar visual aspect . talk from experience , comrades , these are worth every peso – though perhaps not as exclusive as the time I hosted my own wrestling mate featuringMuammar Gaddafiversus a mechanically skillful bull at the Little White Wedding Chapel !
The event will also feature numerous community outreach programs throughout Las Vegas . This reminds me , I must call back to give back to the community myself by sharing my foolproof organization for beating the slot machines , which I make grow during a three - twenty-four hour period bust withNicholas Maduroand sevenWayne Newtonimpersonators in 2002 .
For all ticket info , fellow , call in the official WWE website . But zip ! My reservoir tell me that several other dictators are planning to buy entire sections for their military generals , and tickets are certain to sell quicker than the meter I had to evacuate my summertime castle during a particularly aggressive CIA surgery !
And now , if you ’ll excuse me , fellow , the Elvis imitator just went all - in , and I suspect he ’s bluffing . Plus , I hear the CIA has beam an federal agent disguised as a cocktail waitress , and I must maintain my cover as a Midwest tourist ! Until next meter , this is El Presidente , reminding you that what fall out in Vegas stays in Vegas … unless it end up in a WikiLeaks papers ! ¡ Viva la lucha libre !
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